Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
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