I'm at some bar in brklyn... just made out with a guy named Owen.
He is a pre-school teacher... just sang me a song about weather.
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Two days ago a random guy asked me to sign his forehead 'cause he wanted to have the name of the prettiest girl in the bar on him and never wash it. I just saw him and my signature still there...
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
