I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
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this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
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