the new apple iphone has a feature that can find itself if you lose it, apple is getting closer to making a phone completely drunkproof...
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
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