Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
Holy sore nipples Batman
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
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