You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Randomize
