drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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