You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
Randomize
