We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize
