girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
Randomize
