so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
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