My nipple is on Facebook.
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
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