What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
True strength comes from lack of pants
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