So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
