capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
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