I am puke
batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
you would pick up someone in the library
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
Shit day. Some kids decided to open my car at 3 AM while I was at work and the alarm went off. I went after them with a sword but they were minors so I didn't kill them.
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
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