You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
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