I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
Randomize
