I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
