its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
I skipped work to stalk him.
Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
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