maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
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