i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Randomize