yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
