i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
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