Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.