Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.