I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
Randomize
