It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
The barista asked if I wanted my drink wet or dry, but all that came to mind was farts. You have ruined me.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
you never un-have a 4some
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
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