I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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