I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
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