Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
You need a sexual gate keeper
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
Randomize
