dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
