It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
Randomize
