Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
Slut skills are useful in every country.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
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