Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
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