I feel like death. Did you die last night?
Nope. Ready for round 2. Fiesta!
unreal. Greatest comeback since Jesus
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
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yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
Just got a call at work, I have to consent to a random drug and alcohol test by end of business day, if you arranged this it's the best/worst April fools prank ever.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
My vagina just clenched in fear
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