i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
These 19 Guys Hit The Cougar Jackpot
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
35 Disappointing People Who Failed At Sexting
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions