Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
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