I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
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