fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize