I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
Randomize
