Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
Randomize
