somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
Randomize
