Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
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