And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
My new roommate looks like a troll. Or a serial killer. So if I disappear, show this text to the cops.
Randomize
