A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
Randomize
