I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
Randomize
