it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
Randomize
