I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
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