chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
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