she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
I was so drunk at your wedding that Uber is now showing up in my Spotify recent searches.
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
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