No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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