remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
she smelled like a LAN party
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
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Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
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Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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