I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
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